PHONE SEX±

08/26/2010

PHONE SEX±

Dear Doris,

SO WHERE WAS I?

YEAH....

i remember my very first call..... now when i think about it, its HILARIOUS!! but back then, it was one big disaster...

The year was 1999!! the month September... I ALREADY LAUGHING!!! I had just watched a movie called THE TRUTH ABOUT CATS AND DOGS and in that movie i watched my 1st phone sex!!! in the movie the whole process worked so well...the nigga didnt even try!! immediately he hangs up there is a knock at the door of his office.. AND WALAAA!!! the woman was at the door holding a cell phone!!!

i ran to my parents room and forced open my dads old briefcase and took a few coins that no one seemed to care about...

i ran to the phone booth reciting what the guy sed in the movie!!! MISTAKE 1

i filled the coin slot with a lot of coins... this was going to be recorded in HISTORY!

i called Cynthia!! she was the only chic i knew who had her own phone in her room!! SHE HAD A WHOLE LANDLINE FOR HERSELF and us we dont even have a house phone!!! MISTAKE 2

the guy in the movie didnt say hello, he started by asking " WHAT ARE YOU WEARING"

so i asked Cynthia WHAT SHE WAS WEARING!!! MISTAKE 3

"what are you talking about?" she asked!!! i totally forgot the rest of the conversation i heard in the movie....

"your dress, i said!!" i was on auto pilot!!!! but then again it was me...

"is it red?!!" i asked!!!

Meanwhile some woman is waiting for me outside the phone booth!! looking at me funny!!!!

"no!! its blue!!!" she said still confused!!!

THE SKETCH WAS BACK IN BUSINESS!! plus the conversation had started coming back to me!! in bits though....jumbled up bit!!

"whats inside the blue...is it you!!" MISTAKE 4

DORIS PLEASE NOTE THAT I WAS 12!!!!

i wasnt in my office so i really wasnt sure how this was going to end up!!!

she didnt answer!! the phone had alerted me that my balance was 4 shillings!! i had to move fast!!

"bath tub or counter!" i said....

please note that i had no idea what i was talking about... but whatever i sed, i had to finish by saying, "i will see your sexy self later!"

"young man i will hang up this phone now- never call this number again! whoever you are i will find you and i will kill...." i hang up the phone so hard!

i knew that voice!!! HER MUM!!! i still dont know how much she heard!!

i was in terror for the next few days!!! i was going to be killed!! i faked a headache and didnt go to school for two days!!!!

let me explain the weight of the matter:

Cynthia's mother was my mother best friend!!! She was always at my place eating biscuits and sipping tea!! her husband was huge!!! She pinched me one time when i broke her car side mirror!! Cynthia was in my class, so this issue ha d very high probabilities of getting to my class teacher!!! then my big bro would be called.... MY BIG BRO IS A SHARK IN THE WATER AND IM LONG JOHN SILVER!!!! as in i was in so much trouble...........

when i went back to school everyone was talking about a call Cynthia had gotten....

MY HEART WAS BEATING LIKE THE TOM TOM DRUMS OF WEST AFRICA (a litlle primary feel to it all)

later that day Cynthia came and told me all about the PHONE CALL!!! She had no idea who it ws!! the story going round was so exaggerated!! ATI I WANTED TABIA MBAYA!!!! WHARRRTTTTT!!!!

anyhu i acted like i 'couldnt believe'..... i was so shocked!!! hahaha!!

i didnt use real names!! and Cynthia, if you are reading this, it was me...AND YESI WANTED TABIA MBAYA!!! =) i miss you!!

peace!!

Aug 26, 2010 2:11:13 PM